Thursday, February 12, 2009

Open letter

Dear Chef,
Why, oh why did you have to make corn fritters and hush puppies today? They are both my weakness. I greatly enjoy them, but my waistline is a different story.

Dear person with a crap attitude,
GET OVER IT. You aren't perfect either, sir.

Dear Metro bus driver,
Last time I checked you aren't driving a Pinto, you are driving a huge ass bus. So maybe when you are making a hard right turn you should get off your cell phone and concentrate a little more on not hitting any cars.

Dear college students (yes, multiple!) that got arrested today,
You are idiots. After someone makes the statement, "I'm calling campus police." That is when you stop yelling at someone, harassing them, or doing stupid shit that is deserving of calling campus police, and you run.

Dear account that usually doesn't make any money,
THANK YOU for making money this month!!!! Can we maybe keep this up and try it in March too?

Dear husband,
Thank you for taking advantage of the nice weather and starting to clear off our eye sore of a hill in the back yard. I will reward you for that.

Dear Lila,
Please, dear, pee outside. That's really all I want.

Dear gym patrons,
I am all for everyone getting exercise, but if you are REALLY going to keep this New Year's resolution, please learn how to use the elliptical correctly. Going 2 miles an hour while talking on your cell phone isn't going to help you.

Dear spinning instructor,
I am a spinning virgin. On Saturday, please be kind.

7 comments:

Mary said...

Spinning!?!? You are a brave one!

Hmmm, I think I need more details on the college student story. And might I add that one of my accounts made $70 whole dollars last month after losing half its value? Hooray for small victories!

I hate metrobus drivers too.

Teresa said...

I would say the college student story is one better told in person.

And I was actually referring to a work account, but $70...go you!

Claire said...

Aw, Lila makes me smile...but then, I'm not cleaning up her pee.

Oh, spinning. Take 2 Advil & don't make big plans for the next day or 2! =)

N. said...

Spinning will kick your ass into shape. I took a class 3 times a week, a few years ago, and stuck to it for several months, and I was in the best shape of my life.
Corn fritters and hush puppies... yum!

sarah said...

Ah, yes. The power of fried yummy goodness. Not compatible with spinning, but really, who even cares?

Let me know how the spinning goes. I'd be most worried about my butt...that's why I don't ride my bike often. I have a sensitive tushy.

I look forward to hearing the college peeps story. And meeting that adorable puppeh.

Kristal said...

Your going to reward your husband? You minx!

Margot Is Your Hero said...

"Dear person with a crap attitude,
GET OVER IT. You aren't perfect either, sir."

I agree with you - I meet to many of those people in a day.